Mindset

Unique beliefs

I’ve been reading “Oversubscribed” by Daniel Priestley. You should read it too. It’s full of insights that will make you consider your goals and how you approach your work.

I will write more about it when I finish it, but here’s one question that was asked at the beginning of the book:

What are your strongly held beliefs about what you do?

I have some strongly held beliefs but I want to do more research before I write about some of them. One of my beliefs, though, that I often write and talk about, is that you need to be good at a few different things so that you can earn money in various ways.

You should never be dependent on just a single income source. It’s particularly important for those who have regular jobs. So many people consider being employed a sign of stability — it’s anything but that. People who are employed are most vulnerable to factors that they can’t influence at all. Nearly all my friends that had jobs were at one time or another fired or disappointed with money or their bosses or other demands of their contracts. And yet, they could do nothing.

With the pandemic, it’s even more visible. I read an article today about airports firing hundreds of employees. And what will most of those people do? They will look for another job where they will be as vulnerable as they were now. It’s not even their fault. We were all conditioned at school to want to be employed.

The only option is to break the pattern. Don’t get comfortable. Have side business. Find ways to monetize your hobby. Look for opportunities.

What if no one likes my art?

Just do your job. — Photo by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash

I subscribe to the Farnam Street newsletter and recently there was a quote that I am going to share here:

Recognizing that people’s reactions don’t belong to you is the only sane way to create. If people enjoy what you’ve created, terrific. If people ignore what you’ve created, too bad. If people misunderstand what you’ve created, don’t sweat it. And what if people absolutely hate what you’ve created? What if people attack you with savage vitriol, and insult your intelligence, and malign your motives, and drag your good name through the mud? Just smile sweetly and suggest – as politely as you possibly can – that they go make their own fucking art. Then stubbornly continue making yours.
—Elizabeth Gilbert

Elizabeth Gilbert is the author of the book “Eat, Pray, Love” which I haven’t yet read because the word “Pray” kind of scares me off. However, I like the calls to “Eat” and to “Love” so I might give the book a try anyway.

Elizabeth also did a TED talk, which is one of my favorite TED talks, and I have watched it a couple of times.

“Your Elusive Creative Genius” by Elizabeth Gilbert (TED)

In the talk, she says that after the success of “Eat, Pray, Love” people approached her and said: “Aren’t you afraid you’re never going to be able to top that?”

And what stuck with me is when she said:

I’m pretty young, I’m only about 40 years old. I still have maybe another four decades of work left in me. (…) It’s exceedingly likely that my greatest success is behind me.

That’s scary. What if my greatest success is behind me? And I haven’t even achieved anything that amazing. I have just a few moderate successes: my “Not Today” design, our “Hidden Paws” game. What if nothing I make will top that?

Elizabeth has an answer. It’s in the quote cited at the beginning, “stubbornly continue making yours [art]”. And in the TED talk when she says, “Don’t be afraid. Don’t be daunted. Just do your job.”

I like this attitude. Create things — that’s your job. Everything else is out of your hands.

Ask people to be harsh

This is something that happens too often. It goes like this: An artist posts their art, or a writer posts their story. And they ask for feedback:

“do you like it?”

Or like this:

“tell me what you think, please be kind”

Some try to guilt you into feeling sufficiently awed:

“what do you think about it? I spent 150 hours on it”

To top it off, when they receive critique, they get sad and offended.

This is not a way to improve at anything.

If you want to get better, you have to be fine with receiving negative feedback. More — you have to ask for it. People don’t want to upset you, so if you ask them to be kind, they won’t tell you that your work needs improvement. If you ask: “do you like it?”, you imply you expect a positive response. Rarely will anyone tell you that no, they don’t like it.

To get honest feedback don’t ask if they like it. Assume that there’s a lot to improve and ask about that. Tell them you want to become a better writer or a better artist. Tell them you want to know anything that might help you. Even if your art is awful — you need to hear it.

Don’t ask anyone to reassure you that your work is fine. Instead, ask them for advice.

And whatever you do, don’t get upset or angry, unless you want to make sure that they never tell you their honest opinion ever again.

Tell people NOT to be kind. Ask them to be harsh.